Expectations

There are two major topics just now in my life that I'm dealing with, one is feeling and going with the flow and the second one are expectations. I think that a vast majority of conflicts in our lives we have is simply just becuase of expectations, the ones we have towards each other and towards ourselves. Shakespear put it nicely: "Expectation is the root of all heartache."

I remember exactly how this challange as my friend would say, came into my life. I was in my flat, having lunch with my somebody (if you don't know who somebody is, check my past blog ;)). And I was complaining over a certain situation with some people, how they don't understand, how they want me to act a certain way and do something I currently really don't feel and can't do, when all of a sudden it dawned on me, I'm completely the same. I have and have had many (way too many looking back now) expectations which only brought me pain. Actually they were wishes I pictured in my head for which I craved they would come true and by pushing them so far and so much, I more or less lost it all. Wishes turned into expectations which never were realised and only caused me pain, I then put it out on others and all I was left with, was regret and "what if-s".

I know now that expectations are all around us. Your boss has expectations of how you'll work and you have expectations of how things will be done. We have expectations of how food will taste and how advertised perfume will smell. We even have expectations of how the weather will be like, when they say it's gonna be sunny and warm tomorrow. But we never go so far to ask ourselves what is warm for me, is not necessarily warm for you. What I expect to happen and wish for, is most likely not something you wish for too. What I want to do on vacations is not how you picture you'll wander around this beautiful world of ours. We are surronded with expectations 24/7. Just be aware of all the commercials you see, all the adds you're surronded with, all the advices you read and "must-dos" you see on social media. All the signals of pressure we keep on receiving on a very subconsious and unaware way. It happens constantly! Expectations of how we need to look like, what to do to be happy, what a "percet" realationship is, even what a proper life these days looks like. Well you know what, stop watching TV, buying magazines and look straight when driving on the highway!

And now the big questions, what to do? How not to expect anything ever again?

Well let's be honest, unless we're Buddha or Jezus, I highly doubt we'll be able to live life completely withouth expectations, but we can try. I'm sure you know your inside and how it feels, when you have expectations. What I do is try to be in the moment. Try not to wish for to much or actually do wish for it but then wait for the cosmic kitchen to cook it and bring it to me. Or at least when I am disappointed over something or somebody, I ask myself why: is it becuase I pictured something in my head and this person didn't do/say/feel/react the way I pictured it's going to be or do I really have ground to be mad at somebody or something. I think you can imagine what the most common answer to this questions would be.

So as of today, I'll try even more not to expect, not to have any script written down in this head of mine, cause commonly I'd be just disappointed and I think that life in the end still is way too beautiful to treat it this way. And I'm also sure, well actually this was proved for several times in my life already, that if I trully really want something, it'll come to me, when i'll least expect it and in a form I never thought it could be materialised - and by this I think even more beautiful.

And yes, I'm sure if we'd all have one expectiation less per day in our life, doesn't matter about what, the world would be a much happier place to live in and what's more, we, each and every one of us, would be a much nicer and happier person. And don't you wanna be happy?